Divorce Advice for Women

From LoveToKnow Divorce

Following the divorce advice for women included in this article won't necessarily make the process of legally ending your marriage easier, but it may mean that the process will run more smoothly.

Don't harass or threaten your spouse.

Helpful Divorce Advice for Women

Follow your attorney's advice.

You retained legal counsel because your lawyer has the knowledge and expertise to represent your interests in the divorce action. If you don't follow his or her advice to you, you are defeating the purpose of paying for it.

All communication about the divorce action should go through your attorney.

While it may be tempting to confront or argue with your spouse about some aspect of the divorce action, refrain from doing so. When you make a point of having your lawyer look after negotiating the details of your divorce agreement and any other issues that come up, you are turning the matter over to a person who is interested in the results without being emotionally involved. Your lawyer will be able to deal with the situation in a more logical manner than you can if you try to handle it yourself.

Get a temporary order regarding marital property and financial matters.

One of the important issues facing divorcing couples is how to deal with financial matters until the details of the divorce settlement have been worked out. You will want to have something worked out where you know who is responsible for paying the mortgage, utilities and other household expenses.

Don't hide or damage property to keep it away from your spouse.

During the divorce proceedings, you need to take great care to make sure that you are not tampering with property that belongs to both of you or your spouse alone in any way. Doing so may mean that you will be facing legal consequences from the Court.

Ask for temporary child support.

If you have children, they will continue to need to be provided for by both parents. Getting an order for child support means that if the non-custodial parent doesn't keep up with payments, you can take steps to enforce it. In many states, the payments will be deducted from the non-custodial parent's pay check by the employer.

Allow your spouse to see the children.

Hiding the children from your spouse or refusing to allow him to see them is not the way to behave in this situation. Unless the Court is convinced that it is not in the best interests of the children for the father to have access, he has the right to see them.

Don't move the children to a different jurisdiction without permission from the Court.

Some custody orders will specify that you are barred from relocating more than a certain number of miles away, and you will likely be required to refrain from moving the children out of state.

Don't harass, stalk or threaten to harm your spouse.

He does have the right to ask for a restraining order if he feels threatened by you. You may also be facing criminal charges if you don't conduct yourself appropriately.

Find someone to talk to.

This is an important piece of divorce advice for women. Seeking help from a therapist, divorce support group, or member of the clergy can help you to come to terms with what has happened. You need a safe place to express your hurt, frustration, and anger about the situation. Over time, as you start to heal, you will begin to build a new life for yourself as someone who is no longer part of a married couple.

It may be tempting to confide in your children, but resist the urge to do this. You may feel better after getting something off your chest, but your children will remember what you have said about their father long after you have moved on from that moment.

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