LoveToKnow Divorce:AllComments

From LoveToKnow Divorce

Comments

KAdams,

Child support is supposed to be used to pay for the children's needs. If the amount you are receiving isn't enough to cover their expenses, then you should consult with an attorney to see whether you can ask the Court to increase the amount of child support or compel your ex to pay for a portion of the bus pass fees.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

My ex husband pays me every month for our 2 children. Now, the issue of public school bus passes has come up. We have to pay $300 per child for our 2 children and I'm asking him to help me with half yet he is refusing. He says that is what he pays child support for. Is that true? What about the other monthly expenses I still have to pay that month?

-- Contributed by: KAdams

Dawna,

The child support money is to be used toward the child's needs, including food, shelter, and utilities. Courts have been reluctant to force custodial parents to give an accounting of what they are spending the money on. If you have concerns that the child's basic needs are not being met, then Child Protective Services and/or the police should be notified.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

Federico,

The child support payments are made from the non-custodial parent to the custodial one, even though the funds are to be used to benefit the child. You do have the option of consulting with a lawyer to find out what your legal rights are. Taking this route will likely not improve your relationship with your mother, and you need to consider the consequences of taking legal action before doing so.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

I know a mother who has parental custody, who does not use the child support for the child. There is not much food in her house, she doesn't give money for school lunches, gas money, car repairs. She has told the child that the child support is to pay her bills--what about the child? How can you make her understand and use the money to help the child and not her bank account?

-- Contributed by: Dawna

Sorry for the mistake it's around a $100 a week* that my father pays

-- Contributed by: Federico

I live in New Jersey where child support is required to be paid until a child completes college. My parents have now been divorced for about 8 years, (since 2001). I am now almost 21 years old with one year of school left (I will be finishing in May of 2010). My father currently pays around $100 for me in child support a month. Though my mother is still receiving this money, I am paying for my education with loans in my name, my car/insurance and now my own health insurance since the beginning of 2009 (which she was required to provide according to their divorce agreement.) I buy my own clothes, gas, books ex. (My father has even helped me out with these expenses) On top of all of this my mother is now asking for rent, though I stay with my father during the school year. (I have come to believe that this is what caused my mother to force these expenses on me, as she and my father/his family do not get along.) I also know that she has money of mine in the bank under her name that she has refused to let me access despite these expenses. Is there anything that my father or I can do. Can I request to the court that my share of the child support payments come to me directly.

-- Contributed by: Federico

Jack,

If there is a court order in place directing you to pay child support, you are required to continue paying the same amount until a new order replaces it. Failure to do so may mean you will be subject to collection proceedings and/or be found in contempt of court. You can request a change in the amount of child support due to a change in cir...stances, and I would suggest that you consult with an attorney to get advice about how to proceed.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

Situation where my ex was awarded child support because she was a stay at home mom at time of our divorce and choose not to work. She has since returned to work in the past year and makes equal to or higher than me, and lives in completely paid for place by her inheritance. Daughter's expenses are so limited and she used the child support minimally, saves the rest and takes vacation with daughter. I would think she would not need it and we should just split 50/50 expenses since we have joint custody. I don't think I need a lawyer, no the forms to fill out, but am I on right track?

-- Contributed by: Jack

John,

You could ask for the level of child support payments to be changed due to a change in your ex's financial cir...stances. Please contact a lawyer to find out how to get the process started.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

I have my son 50% of the time for 10 years now and i have to pay child support because his mom was suspended from her job due to negligence on her part. So instead of her getting a different job until her suspension is over she decides to collect welfare and get me for child support. She is perfectly capable of getting another job but chooses not to so she can collect child support. I have my son exactly the same amount of time that she has him every single week. I feel like i am not being treated fair. Is there anything i can do to lower my child support or make her get a job.?

-- Contributed by: john

Joe,

Unless the child support order has been changed by the Court, you need to continue making payments as directed. You can ask the court to change the terms based on a change in cir...stances, and you can choose to represent yourself if you wish.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

My 18yo son has moved out of his mother's house. Can I stop paying her the child support and pay him the money. child support is ordered from alabama emancication is 19. The child is still in high school will graduate this may, but is living with a friend. I would much rather send to him to help with his expenses. If I can do this, do I have to have a lawyer or can I just go before a judge? Thanks

-- Contributed by: Joe

Nicole,

I guess the bottom line is that the child needs the supplies. Make whatever arrangements will work for your particular situation.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

Eric,

For your ex to have the level of child support changed, she will have to prove that there was a material change in cir...stances. This means her financial records will need to be examined by the Court. She can ask for a different amount to be paid, but you do have the right to contest that if you do not agree. Please get expert legal advice if and when she brings a motion to change the level of support.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

I mean... is the custodial parent supposed to be providing the necessary supplies.

-- Contributed by: Nicole

If the noncustodial parent pays full child support as indicated in the state guidelines, is the noncustodial parents supposed to provide the necessary supplies for the overnights and day visitations?

-- Contributed by: Nicole

I have no problem in paying my child support. However, for years my exwife was making twice the amount of money as I made, and of course, she didn't disclose that - I continued to pay support that was extremely high. Because of all the "extra" money she was making and getting - her lifestyle became increasingly more lavish. She was a real estate agent. So - she purchases a $750k home, 3 new cars - and went crazy with the credit cards. Now, the market has cooled off - and she isn't making what she was making, and her bills are piling up. She wants to double my child support. It seems unfair that in the state I live in - the court doesn't care about that. They don't care about how she's overextended herself. They don't care that, with the increase of child support - that she wants, I will have problems providing for myself and them when they come to visit me. And, it seems there is nothing that I can do about it.

-- Contributed by: Eric

Richard,

Child support is to be used to cover the child's expenses, which could include extra-curricular activities.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

Does child support include items like extra curricular activities that the child may want to do or already be doing a club, program or rhose sorts of activities.

-- Contributed by: richard

Bobbi,

Both parents have a legal responsibility to provide the necessities of life for their children. Your husband may feel that since he pays child support already that the money should be used for supplies for your son, including when he is with his father.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

John,

The money you are paying for child support should be used to cover necessary expenses. If you have a good relationship with your former wife, you could start by asking for some clarification about what the child support payments are being used for and why she is asking for additional funds.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

My ex-wife and I divorced on good terms and are more than civil to each other. We have joint custody 60/40-50/50 depending on the week...there are times when I have them 60% of time as well. I pay support monthly..in fact..i paid for 4 months before the order went through. I also pay for medical coverage, half of all out of pocket medical/dental, and half of day care expenses. I supply them with clothing consistently also. Yet, I am continuely asked for half of the money she spends on things for the kids...from lunch money to clothing that is not necessary. The order also states that they are to be double covered on her medical/dental coverage as well..this has not been done. Is it unfair for me to request that the money I pay be used for lunches and other day to day neccessities. Otherwise..I'm not sure what the money is being used for.. The money I pay is more than enough to cover these expenses..with some left over to play with.

-- Contributed by: john

My husband and I are divorcing and currently are under an temporary order. In this order he is to pay a specific amount of support. The amount does not bother me, it's not about the money. However, what he expects now is that I send formula, diapers, food, wipes, ointment, clothing, pacifiers, etc. for his visits with our son. Could someone point me in the right direction: I would like to know exactly what I am responsible for providing for HIS visits with our son. Should he not be providing for our child's basic needs while he's at his house?

-- Contributed by: Bobbi

TAM:

Both parents have a legal responsibility to provide for their children, to the extent they are able to do so. If you feel that your ex should be paying more, then you may want to discuss increasing the amount of support he is paying to see if you can work out an increase between the two of you. If you are unable to do so, you have the option of consulting with an attorney who can assist you with getting a formal child support order put in place.

Jodee Redmond, LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

My ex (never married) and I have 1 daughter. To keep the peace I agreed not to go through court for child support or visitation. For the most part this works. I have our daughter 90% of the time as he works alot. He makes very good money and right now I don't work (I am remarried w/3 other children) but I'm going to school. He gives me $80 a week(for the last 9 yrs) and with that I'm supposed to pay for clothes, food, shelter, transportation to and from school, dance class, soccer, 1/2 of ortho pmnts, music instrument. Am I wrong to want to ask him to pay more child support?

-- Contributed by: TAM

Sheryl,

Child support payments are supposed to go toward paying expenses for the child. You originally agreed to a 50/50 custody arrangement, and that has now changed. It's not unreasonable for you to want to renegotiate your original agreement. If you and your former husband are not able to come to an agreement, then you do have the option of taking this matter in front of a judge to get a ruling.

Jodee Redmond

LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

My ex and I are supposed to have 50/50 parenting time. In the last year, I have had our daughter over 75% of the year. No child support order was done because of the 50/50 agreement, but I now I think I should get child support. He has always paid his half of day care, extra curricular activities and clothing. Am I right to ask for child support? He does not agree, because of his willingness to pay 1/2 of everything, just the same. I am confused- isn't child support also supposed to go toward the time, responsiblities and providing for the child I do because I have her most often, as well as the clothing, classes, etc?

-- Contributed by: Sheryl

Ashley,

The Court can request an accounting of what the child support money is being used for. Your husband would have to file papers asking the Court to order the mother to provide this information. If you have concerns that the child is not being cared for properly, the police or your local Child Protective Services agency can intervene a lot quicker than the courts can.

Jodee Redmond

LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

My stepdaughter's mother is using the child support payments to pay for her cell phone. We spoke with my stepdaughter today, and she was crying because she was hungry and there was nothing to eat but ham and cheese in the house, not even bread for a sandwich. We have her mother recorded saying that she uses the payments for her cell phone, and the issuing court is MS. can we do something about this?

-- Contributed by: ashley

Hi Kristine,

The child support payments are to be used to pay for the expenses in raising the children, no matter where they happen to be.

Jodee Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

My question is: Is child support suppoed to pay for clothing, hot lunches, etc. when the children are at their father's house and when they are at my house or is it just to cover the cost's at my house?

-- Contributed by: kristine

Hi Debbie,

Child care is an expense related to raising children; I don't see any reason why child support cannot be used toward child care expenses.

JC Redmond LoveToKnow Editor

-- Contributed by: JCRedmond

can child support be used to pay for child care

-- Contributed by: debbie
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